The Naughty List

I've already talked about how I struggle with telling my girls the myth of Santa Claus. I mostly came to terms with it last year by making sure that the Veggie Tales St. Nicholas* story is watched often to keep the true story and the meaning of Santa at the forefront. My four year old is getting it a little. She told me the other day that Santa's real name is St. Nicholas.

But this is also the first year that she is exposed to peers at school talking about Santa Claus. And, as it turns out, her preschool teacher.

She loves her teacher. I like her teacher. Minus two incidents (one that has nothing to do with my child).

Yesterday she came home from school and told me that you have to 'have (short for behave) for Santa to bring you presents. My daughter does 'have so she expects to get presents. But Miss H--- said that K---- won't get presents if he doesn't 'have. (I'm not going to even get into the public shaming side of things, which I'm not a fan of.)

I really hadn't thought about the naughty/nice list side of Santa until then. It's not something my parents emphasized or held over our heads for good behavior (thank you, Mom and Dad). I cringed a little, and then told my daughter that I feel that Santa Claus is about selflessly giving to others and loving others. Everyone is good sometimes and bad sometimes, but everyone (particularly a four year old kid for Pete's sake) deserves a present from Santa. And this is all I'll say again and again as she brings up the naughty/nice issue.

On further contemplation, I realized there are two main reasons I don't like that side of Santa Claus. First of all, getting presents is not the right motivation for good behavior. (Neither is fear of punishment, I know that even though we use it sometimes, but we're working on that.) I want my children to want to do the right thing because it's the right thing. Not because they want to get more things.

Second, what about the kid whose personality makes it harder to behave, particularly in a classroom? It's honestly easy for my daughter to behave at school. She's quiet, gets along well with most people, likes pleasing adults, and enjoys learning. She's never had a single day when she didn't want to go to school (I've seen almost every one of her classmates reluctantly hanging onto their parent's leg, not wanting to go in, at one point or another). But the kid who has a lot of energy, who would really just prefer to pretend to be a dinosaur all day? Behaving, according to the confines of preschool, is a bit harder. That doesn't make him bad or less deserving of presents.

What do you think of the naughty/nice list side of Santa Claus? Or do you not overthink these things like I do?


* I love something new about this show this year. I hadn't noticed it before. At the end, the Veggies leave their church worship to go out and serve their neighbor in need. Yes, worshipping in church is important. But serving, doing exactly what Christ would have done, is more important.

My Struggle with Santa

I struggle with Santa. When I was a child, probably much younger than my parents would have liked, I set out to try to disprove Santa. As a skeptical and logical child, I knew that the myth of Santa Claus couldn’t be true, but I wanted my parents to admit it.

 Now I’m a parent. The first couple of years with a child in the house still didn’t need to involve Santa. Last year was a little different. We made cookies for Santa, but my daughter really didn’t get it.

This year she is a lot more aware. She sees Santa everywhere. I don’t like the idea of lying to her, no matter how magical and fun it might be for a few years. I also don’t want to squash any of that magic and fun for a three-year-old.

This I do know about Santa: Any discussion of Santa is going to include the original story of St. Nicholas and the spirit of Christmas and Santa Claus rather than a fat man who brings you presents because you’ve been good. Last year I saw a Veggie Tales movie called Saint Nicholas: The Story of Joyful Giving. I bought it this year and it’s going to be a regular part of our Christmas experience every year. It tells the story of the original Saint Nicholas and focuses on the joy of giving and serving others. But you may have gathered that from the title.

I also know that if my children ever question Santa, I’m not going to try to perpetuate the myth. No matter their age, if they have doubts in the fat man in a red suit, I’m not going to lie to them. In our house, Santa will be a symbol of giving. Which will involve us giving to those in need since we are so blessed (and when I was young, my family was often on the receiving end of that kind of giving). And the focus of Christmas will be on the birth of the Savior.

Here’s a blog post I’ve seen about what Santa means and how to explain it to your child once they do start wondering.

Truth About Santa